On February 29th, 2008, I was driving down 77th street. I was between 34th ave and Northern Blvd, when a an SUV drove out of a parking lot to a Queens County Savings bank to my left. Unaware that I was driving apparently, the driver slammed his blueish vehicle’s right corner into my driver’s side door. I pulled ahead of him and we both stopped off to the side. I called my father up and asked what do I do, he told me, “get his licence plate number, immediately.” I did just that. The other driver and I got out of the car. The other driver was wearing an unimpressive suit, and sported a small afro and a beard which I would describe as a little bit more than a five o’clock shadow. He spoke:
“Why did you not see me?”
This questions alerted me that he was (in my opinion) an orifice of the posterior. I informed him, “You were coming out of a parking lot, I was on the main road. You hit the side of my car with the front of your car, you didn’t see me.” He simply said, “Give me your insurance, I’ll call the police.” I sat back in may car and opened up my glove box. He walked to my car, “Why won’t you show me your insurance?” I told him, “I have to get it, it’s in my glove box, you have to wait while I get it.” He said, “You don’t have insurance.” He started to get back into his car. At this time, I had found my insurance card, quickly I stood in front of his car and asked where he was going. He told me I was refusing to show him my insurance and that he was going to call the police and report that I was driving without insurance. I said, “You already said you were calling the police, now I’m calling the police.” As I was speaking to a 911 dispatcher, he approached me and said, “Give me your insurance!” He extended his hand to me as if expecting me to hand it over to him. I told him I’m not going to give him my insurance. I would kindly read him my policy number. He repeated, “You are refusing to show me your insurance.” As I was on the phone with the 911 dispatcher, I overheard him read my license plate and give the location of the accident, I figured he was on the phone with 911 as well. He got into his car again. I stood next to his driver-side door waving my insurance at him yelling, but he simply drove off. Had I have know what the future would hold, I would have drove after him.
The police showed up. I filed my report. I called Geico (my insurance company) the next day and reported the accident. I informed them everything that had happened, they asked if I was hurt. I told them I was fine and they stressed how important it was to them that among everything else, I wasn’t hurt. They told me his insurance would have to pay the damage and I was all for that, after all, it was his fault. In this time I had to go to the precinct pay for a copy of the police report to hand off to anyone who needed it. I now had the hit and run criminal’s name, Garry Anselme. This course took more time than it should have. About a month went by and I called for a follow up. They told me their records showed I requested that the other driver’s insurance pay for the damage, then they asked me if I wanted to “go ahead and do that…” So, nothing had actually been done yet. The claim was officially put in to Allstate on April 1st. Geico also called me after the claim was put in and asked me if I was harmed, because they didn’t have any record of my health, post-accident. I guess it was very important to them after all. So I don’t hear anything for a while.
More time passes. I call for a follow up, they tell me that the other driver isn’t responding to calls or letters. They informed me that that they would have to go to his home personally and make one last effort to reach him via face to face if they didn’t hear from him by the 19th of May. I was told I could have an estimate made for the damages to my car in the mean time. The representative at the Allstate facility assessed the damage and said that simply based on where the damage was, it was clear he was at fault. More time passed…
May 19th came a went. I got a call in early June. I was told by the Allstate case-worker that everything was just about set, all they needed was a copy of the police report. I was told that I could wait for them to obtain it or I could send them a copy of mine to speed things up. I sent it and still more time passed without any updates. I called for one and was told that I had to deal with my case-worker directly, but she was on vacation. It was now the middle of July when I received a letter in the mail from Allstate. (Click to blow up.)
I called to go nuts. Allstate told me they really cannot do anything. If he claims he wasn’t part of the accident, I will have to take him to small claims court. I asked if him simply saying it wasn’t him was enough for them to pat themselves on the back having completed an investigation of any merit. Apparently so. This is “the information that they have.” I asked if they had even looked at his car to see if the measurements would match my claim. They said he refused to let them see his car for such an assessment. Of course, this is perfectly fine. So the “information” they spoke of was actually the lack of information in reality. This is unreal to me. So folks, there you have it. If you ever want to avoid the consequences of an accident, simply speed off and leave the scene, ignore the insurance company for months and when/if they finally track you down, simply deny knowing anything about an accident and refuse to let them even see your car, they’ll oblige and you’ll be off the hook. So for any of you drivers out there, I urge you to switch to Allstate, you really are in good hands. You can run people off the road and if you say it wasn’t you, Allstate will wash their hands of the entire thing. While my friend Garry is in good hands with Allstate, the same good hands of Allstate that are balled into fists and [car that Dodge makes] up my [donkey] without lubrication.
As for Garry Asnelme of 33-45 94th Street, Jackson Heights NY, 11372, whose license plate number is ALY4508 – you are (in my humble opinion) a total [German for “To Strike”] asshole. I hope you get whatever you deserve in life.
**UPDATE** Apparently, my friend Garry is unable to appear in court and my claim is to be paid by Allstate. Of all the things you could possibly imagine as a reason why he won’t be appearing, you probably won’t be expecting this one: he’s dead. Apparently, Garry Asnelme is now deceased. I wonder if wishing him everything he deserved enduced some major karma…