Things I’ve Learned from Pro Wrestling

The good guy doesn’t always win.

Even at your dream job, you may get stuck with an asshole boss.

I learned words like, “tenacity” and “fortitude,” some other greats; prowess, acumen, reign…

I learned a lot of anatomy too; solar plexus, carotid artery, meniscus, clavicle – as well as slang terms, like “bread basket.”

Everybody has a price, everybody.

A good entrance is always a huge plus.

Your most beloved heroes can really disappoint you.

Your most hated nemesis can suddenly see the error of their ways.

Speaking your mind is usually the best course of action. If people dislike you because of your stance, that’s their choice, at least they know who you are.

Charisma is a must in life.

Be careful of people who are just using your to get to the next level (or what they think is the next level).

Some people change by pretending to be someone else, but some people change because they stop pretending.

Always part on good terms, if possible.

I Prove Jeff Jarrett Sucks

jeffjarrettI’ve been watching wrestling for almost 19 years. I have seen a lot of faces come and go. One face, however, that should have gone a long time ago, but managed to stick around, is that of Jeff Jarrett. Jeff Jarrett is not enjoyable to watch at all. I never was excited about him, either for or against him. I just didn’t like the guy, not in the “I boo the bad guy” way either. Disliking a bad guy in wrestling (for you non-wrestling fans) is known in the business as “heat.” A wrestler gains “heat” by appealing negatively to the fans. Jeff Jarrett has simply bored the life out of me whenever he is taking up precious TV time. As a heel (wresting jargon for “bad guy”) he generates no heat, the fans just want him to go away. As a good guy, he’s just boring. Both sides of that coin see him doing the same thing, breaking a guitar over someone’s head. Unlike the Honky Tonk Man who predates him, nobody cares when he does it, partially because he did it way too much.

So after being a unentertaining wrestler for a long time, he founded his own company and has been there ever since. He made himself champion, of course, for a while. It took several years before I think he may have finally realized just how lousy he was to watch. But onto my main point, how do I actually prove that Jarrett sucks?

This is Barry Horowitz

barrryhorowitzBarry Horowitz was what is known as a “jobber.” This means that he basically lost every match to major superstars who were being made to look good. He collected a paycheck and moved on with his life. Horowitz, however, shocked the world once, by winning a match against a then-superstar known as “Skip.” Skip claimed this was a fluke and the two tangled again, only to see another victory for Horowitz. The feud came to a head at Summer Slam 1995, so you have this jobber appearing on a major pay per view event. For only a minute, the entire world rallied behind Barry Horowitz hoping he would overcome the evil Skip. To those of us who remember this, I ask you, have you ever cared about any Jeff Jarrett match nearly as much as this one Barry Horowitz match? To those who only are finding out about this now, I’ll answer for you, “no.” Jeff Jarrett has never garnered as much interest as this one match with Barry Horowitz. I cannot think of any further evidence I need to present to relay this message any clearer. Barry Horowitz, who was not particularly interesting as a performer still managed to perform on a level higher than Jeff Jarrett has been able to attain.